Time for a Break

As i sit down here to compose this post, many things come to mind. The first thing that comes to mind is the reason I started blogging in the first place which was to meet new and interesting people that I could interact with and be myself. To that extent, I have succeeded. However, somewhere along this journey that I have taken, I found mysself wanting more than just online friends.
I know that many of you that are out here in blogland have experienced similar situations and so you know where I'm coming from. I have spent the last several days trying to come to grip with the fact that at my age and body type and the fact that I'm currently married with children will no doubt put me out to pasture as far as ever eing able to have a true relationship filled with compassion and love that so many of us desire.
I would also like to take this oppurtunity to thank the 21 followers that I do have who found my writings to date interesting enough to want to follow me. My thoughts and prayers go out to Landyn, who is currently struggling with parents, housing, schooling, and basically just survival. My good friend Deadwing, who has taken the first step to freedom by coming out to his family and close friends at work, but who still struggles with trying to find a companion to spend the rest of his life with.
Bob, with whom I have met with and conversed with personally, you are the greatest friend and ally that a gay man could ever have. Keep up the good work. Mirrorboy, who has had his own share of problems that come his way, and at the tender age of 16, manages to hold this little community together. There are several more of you out here who I haven't mentioned by name but please know that I think of you every day.
I hope that one day, we can all live as equals, here in the human race. I will continue to read your blogs and follow your lives as much as you allow me to but for the time being, I'm going to put mine on hold until I can figure out what I want to do with it.

Forever Alone,
Jayson